Star Wars: Retold (by someone who hasn't seen it) from Joe Nicolosi on Vimeo.
and this one for Ted and his auto-tune interest:
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Fyeh.
So I get another call today, from the shirt people (you know, the ones I feel like I do nothing but complain about lately?) this morning, confirming that yes, I will be making the shirts for them by Saturday, and that I can bring in the shirts on Friday and Tim will give me the money. So later on, I'm at home, with chilli con carne simmering, and I'm looking up the design (as yes, I had deleted MY designs in a fit of pique) that they want when I discover something. My google-search leads me to the musician's MySpace page, which leads me to two realisations:
1) MySpace is awful Even loading up someone's page makes my Firefox crash and makes me want to run back to my Facebook.
B) When these people were originally calling me 5 or 6 times a day to quibble over what I was going to theoretically do, one of them mentioned casually that Tim had said I was good with Photoshop, and could I put the logo onto one of the promo pics and that they'd give me credit for the design, as well as for the t-shirts. I said okay, and sent them a basic logo spot, then 3 or 4 half-assed attempts of mine to make the photo cooler, saying that they weren't finals, but just me messing around with ideas, and to tell me what they thought. This email was responded to with the 7 weeks of silence, so I figured they didn't think much. Well, what I found on the MySpace page was one of my designs which they'd clearly liked, as it's the Australian street poster for the tour. It's on the MySpace as such, with no credit to me listed.
Now, I get not giving me the shirt credit, because I didn't do them (except the two prototypes), but that? Come on! It's my work! Tanja pointed out that she didn't see much of a change, so I'll let you judge:
Here's the original picture.
Then the logo they sent me.
And this is what I made in 10 minutes.
So the question is: Did I change it enough to make the new work my intellectual property? Not that I want to kick up a big stink, but it just mad me angry(er).
To top it all off, I got ANOTHER call this evening from them, wanting to meet me tomorrow, even saying they'd drag Tim along. They then asked about the shirts again, and I confirmed they'd be ready tomorrow. They sounded presently surprised. So why did they want to meet with me if not to pick up the shirts?
So I probably won't give them a serve when I see them tomorrow, as I'm nonconfrontational and polite (read: gutless) so I'll probably express my concerns as a "goshdarnit, haven't I been worried" joke and I won't be heard.
But hey. For all I know they want to apologise. And if you belive that, I have a use Death Star to sell you.
1) MySpace is awful Even loading up someone's page makes my Firefox crash and makes me want to run back to my Facebook.
B) When these people were originally calling me 5 or 6 times a day to quibble over what I was going to theoretically do, one of them mentioned casually that Tim had said I was good with Photoshop, and could I put the logo onto one of the promo pics and that they'd give me credit for the design, as well as for the t-shirts. I said okay, and sent them a basic logo spot, then 3 or 4 half-assed attempts of mine to make the photo cooler, saying that they weren't finals, but just me messing around with ideas, and to tell me what they thought. This email was responded to with the 7 weeks of silence, so I figured they didn't think much. Well, what I found on the MySpace page was one of my designs which they'd clearly liked, as it's the Australian street poster for the tour. It's on the MySpace as such, with no credit to me listed.
Now, I get not giving me the shirt credit, because I didn't do them (except the two prototypes), but that? Come on! It's my work! Tanja pointed out that she didn't see much of a change, so I'll let you judge:
Here's the original picture.
Then the logo they sent me.
And this is what I made in 10 minutes.
So the question is: Did I change it enough to make the new work my intellectual property? Not that I want to kick up a big stink, but it just mad me angry(er).
To top it all off, I got ANOTHER call this evening from them, wanting to meet me tomorrow, even saying they'd drag Tim along. They then asked about the shirts again, and I confirmed they'd be ready tomorrow. They sounded presently surprised. So why did they want to meet with me if not to pick up the shirts?
So I probably won't give them a serve when I see them tomorrow, as I'm nonconfrontational and polite (read: gutless) so I'll probably express my concerns as a "goshdarnit, haven't I been worried" joke and I won't be heard.
But hey. For all I know they want to apologise. And if you belive that, I have a use Death Star to sell you.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Required: One Padded Room
As I discussed here (4th paragraph), I had been approached in early June to do some shirts for a promotions company. Well, after 7 weeks of silence, I got a phone call while waiting for the train this morning.
“Oh, yes, it’s So-and-so. Can we still get two shirts with just the name, not the design?”
“Ummm, I suppose. I still have the shirts I bought last time.”
“Yeah, those will do. Can we have them by Saturday?”
“Ummm. I guess.”
“Okay, do you have other So-and-so’s number?”
“No. And I can’t write it down. I’m at a train station.”
“I’ll call you later when you’ll be able to write it down.” *click*
It took me a moment, but then I was so angry I wanted to thrash around and scream. 7 freakin’ weeks!?!? No word? I mean, come on! I’m a cottage industry and I’m more professional than these mooks. I don’t even know if I have the designs anymore, as I’ve deleted most of them thinking, oh I don’t know, that I’d never hear from them again!
So (since I have the inability to say no to people who want to pay me), I’ll do their two shirts, and then I’ll give them a serve. I might type it, so I can get the tone right.
Sigh. It’s hard out there for a pimp t-shirt maker.
Lucas Brown | Proxy Champignon
Master of Brainthinking
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Shirts.
As I went up to Oporto to get my lunch today, I walked through the street market they have in Newtown every Saturday. As always, there are people just selling random stuff, like belts made from recycled materials, old albums and CDs, books of all sorts, and the inevitable t-shirt printers. Now, most of the people at markets who do t-shirts are screen printers, with a few tie-dyers and tailors/seamstresses thrown in. Nobody seems to do shirts they way I do. Admittedly, the method I use (cutting the stenicls, then painting with brushes) is not the most efficient, easiest or most practical way of doing things, but it does give me a level of control that I enjoy.
However, lately I've been thinking hard about my printing. My first thinkings were in the vein of more artisitic and impressive (read: difficult) designs to really how what I can do. That line of thinking has been difficult to develop, seeing as the majority of the shirts I do are demand-focused (ie I do what people ask me to do), so these new shirts would pretty much be for me. Also, Stencil Revolution, which was my main source of inspiration, was shut down about a year ago, and has not really gotten back on its feet since. I've come up with a few sort of meta-design examples (my Irgendwas Auf Deutsch one, or a few based on the cartoons of Phil Somerville such as "Tragically Born Without A Logo" (overlaid on a collage of logos I've done for other people, such as the Firetrybe logo, the Carbon Cowboy Design I did for Phil, a Triforce with wings and others) and "Due to computer error, this t-shirt is completely free of advertising," (directly above my logo, heh), but I'm not getting the oomph I wantedto. Most people just assume I got them at JayJays or something and don't give my shirts a second look.
As for my process, it's actually cost me a few jobs. It's fairly difficult to accurately mass-produce shirts, as they never quite turn out identical, and paint builds up on the stencils, make each use afterward less accurate. Large areas of solid colour are also a problem, as it's tough to get a smooth, even shape with clean edges. I made some shirts for a local band that turned out not-so-great because their logo was a large yellow oval (large area of solid colour) with the band name on it and they wanted a dozen shirts, but couldn't afford good ones, so had cheap $3 shirts, which were so thin they barely held still under my brush. The results were less than stellar, and I've never heard from them again.
Recently, the mother of one of my workmates called me to ask if I could print some shirts for a singer she is doing promotion work for. She sent me a design which was very easy, but said that design was from the last tour and they wanted a newer one. We talked for a bit and after I dissuaded her from putting words on the back of jeans, she said she'd get back to me. A few weeks pass. I suddenly get a call, and after a few confused moment, relise who it is, and that yes, she's still interested. After debating every tiny detail of what she wants (to a ridiculous degree, taken two further calls, each spaced about 5 minutes apart while I'm at work), we agree to two prototype shirts using the new design and then many more to come later. I buy two blanks and wait on the email. She calls again to make sure the shirts I got are the right type, and casually asks me to photoshop the logo onto the promo picture, since I'm "good at those sorts of things." The email comes and the design is, in a word, impossible. It's a spanish-style cross with so many criss-crossing loops and whorls and patterns that even if I could cut a stencil, it would be impossible to use more than once and would probably break apart. I photoshop the image though, even throwing together a few cool effects and a couple different versions and send them back, with my worries about the design. I mention that maybe they could come up with a simple design for the shirt for me to do. I get a short email back saying they would run it by the artist and get back to me.
I've heard nothing back. It's been 3 weeks. I even did the plaintive email of "Are we still doing the prototypes?" and got nothing.
So anyway.
The reason I brought up the markets is that the designs I see at markets are always awesome and original and different. They're huge, sprawling, detailed (whereas my designs are usually limited to A4 or A3 size due to my printer). Also, they're mostly selling the shirts for $10 or $15 dollars. I sell mine for $20, and though Tanja keeps saying I should raise my prices for the amount of work I put in, I feel bad asking more (possibly due to being afraid that someone will tell me my work isn't worth more).
So even if I pony up the dough to get a large stock of blanks, find some designs that can compete, I'm still going to be two stalls away from people who are better at it, can mass-produce, and are selling for less.
Basically, it makes me wonder if this is ever going to be more than a hobby for me.
However, lately I've been thinking hard about my printing. My first thinkings were in the vein of more artisitic and impressive (read: difficult) designs to really how what I can do. That line of thinking has been difficult to develop, seeing as the majority of the shirts I do are demand-focused (ie I do what people ask me to do), so these new shirts would pretty much be for me. Also, Stencil Revolution, which was my main source of inspiration, was shut down about a year ago, and has not really gotten back on its feet since. I've come up with a few sort of meta-design examples (my Irgendwas Auf Deutsch one, or a few based on the cartoons of Phil Somerville such as "Tragically Born Without A Logo" (overlaid on a collage of logos I've done for other people, such as the Firetrybe logo, the Carbon Cowboy Design I did for Phil, a Triforce with wings and others) and "Due to computer error, this t-shirt is completely free of advertising," (directly above my logo, heh), but I'm not getting the oomph I wantedto. Most people just assume I got them at JayJays or something and don't give my shirts a second look.
As for my process, it's actually cost me a few jobs. It's fairly difficult to accurately mass-produce shirts, as they never quite turn out identical, and paint builds up on the stencils, make each use afterward less accurate. Large areas of solid colour are also a problem, as it's tough to get a smooth, even shape with clean edges. I made some shirts for a local band that turned out not-so-great because their logo was a large yellow oval (large area of solid colour) with the band name on it and they wanted a dozen shirts, but couldn't afford good ones, so had cheap $3 shirts, which were so thin they barely held still under my brush. The results were less than stellar, and I've never heard from them again.
Recently, the mother of one of my workmates called me to ask if I could print some shirts for a singer she is doing promotion work for. She sent me a design which was very easy, but said that design was from the last tour and they wanted a newer one. We talked for a bit and after I dissuaded her from putting words on the back of jeans, she said she'd get back to me. A few weeks pass. I suddenly get a call, and after a few confused moment, relise who it is, and that yes, she's still interested. After debating every tiny detail of what she wants (to a ridiculous degree, taken two further calls, each spaced about 5 minutes apart while I'm at work), we agree to two prototype shirts using the new design and then many more to come later. I buy two blanks and wait on the email. She calls again to make sure the shirts I got are the right type, and casually asks me to photoshop the logo onto the promo picture, since I'm "good at those sorts of things." The email comes and the design is, in a word, impossible. It's a spanish-style cross with so many criss-crossing loops and whorls and patterns that even if I could cut a stencil, it would be impossible to use more than once and would probably break apart. I photoshop the image though, even throwing together a few cool effects and a couple different versions and send them back, with my worries about the design. I mention that maybe they could come up with a simple design for the shirt for me to do. I get a short email back saying they would run it by the artist and get back to me.
I've heard nothing back. It's been 3 weeks. I even did the plaintive email of "Are we still doing the prototypes?" and got nothing.
So anyway.
The reason I brought up the markets is that the designs I see at markets are always awesome and original and different. They're huge, sprawling, detailed (whereas my designs are usually limited to A4 or A3 size due to my printer). Also, they're mostly selling the shirts for $10 or $15 dollars. I sell mine for $20, and though Tanja keeps saying I should raise my prices for the amount of work I put in, I feel bad asking more (possibly due to being afraid that someone will tell me my work isn't worth more).
So even if I pony up the dough to get a large stock of blanks, find some designs that can compete, I'm still going to be two stalls away from people who are better at it, can mass-produce, and are selling for less.
Basically, it makes me wonder if this is ever going to be more than a hobby for me.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Transformers 2: Electric Boogaloo (warning: long & nerdy)
Went to see TF: RotF (which I still read as "Transformers: Rolling On The Floor"). Some impressions (slight spoilers):
Though he was only there for about 10 seconds, I really liked the inclusion of Sideswipe. He was one of my favourite G1 characters when I was young. I also like that his movie alt-form (a new Corvette Stingray concept) was similar to his old school alt-form (a red Lamborghini Countach) in that they are both bedroom poster fodder. Who cares if they're illogical? They look badass.
Speaking to the robot forms for a moment, it was nice to see a little bit of variation (Demolishor, the 2-wheeled gyroscope-style robot from the trailers, though again, he got 4 minutes of smashing stuff before being put down, Doctor Scalpel, Wheelie, as well as Jetfire and Soundwave, but more on them later) but the majority of the Decepticons just looked like generic robots out of the model kit. They even recycled the CG models of Blackout and Bonecrusher from the first movie! Teletraan-1 said the Blackout lookalike was another character called Grindor, who merely had the same alt-mode. The piles and piles of Decepticons that show up near the end of the film for the big battle? We have no idea who they are. They don't get names. For most of the movie, I was thinking that I couldn't wait to get home and look these characters up on Teletraan-1 to see who the hell they were meant to be and why I should care. Let me paint the picture: over-designed vaguely humanoid shaped silver/gun-metal grey robot with slight defining bits on the shoulders (car doors, wings, bulldozer treads, backhoe tires). Yeah. I can totally tell one of those from another. Yeah. Even Megatron was hard to differentiate towards the end. Oh, was that Megatron that just got hit really bad and lost an arm? I don't know.
Speaking of Megatron, was it me, or did he get a major power-down for this film? I mean, he was essential the second-in-command to The Fallen, so he took a level drop in Badass. He got his cool new tank form (gained by having some minions ripping apart one of their own in a creepy moment, also foreshadowing Prime's upgrade) that could somehow fly. Then he is tough for the whole film until the last 30 minutes when he become just another Decepticon getting beat back by the army (see my gripes about the army below) and ends up getting a cowardice lesson from STARSCREAM of all people.
Good designs that caught my attention:
Jetfire. An SR-71 Blackbird. Completely fits with the character (who was the baddest thing on the block back in the day, but is now falling apart and prone to mechanical failure). And I got to be a smart guy when I reminded Adrian that G1 Jetfire was a Decepticon scientist who later defected. Plus he gets to kick a large level of backside and, according to Teletraan-1 is made of "100% pure concetrated ownage".
Skids & Mudflap: Though their robot modes were beaten with several ugly sticks and their behaviour was borderline offensive, here's what was interesting about them. The original G1 Skids was a Honda City Turbo (seen here) but was always mistaken for a minivan, as described here: "Though Skids' toy turned into a Honda City Turbo, his car mode was often misinterpreted in Transformers fiction as one of the then-new minivans, despite the fact that a Honda City Turbo is a subcompact car, and as such, could theoretically be stowed in the back seat of an actual minivan. This is likely because most Americans in 1985 wouldn't know what a subcompact car is." So when they design Skids and Mudflap for the Movie, they were a Chevy Beat and a Chevy Trax, both members of the newly made compact-pseudo SUV-marketed-as-cars like the Toyota Matrix and the Pontiac Vibe.
Soundwave: HE MADE IT! After getting cut from the first movie, Soundwave shows up. Soundwave as communications satellite was awesome, though I would have liked to see him take a more active role. Plus, Frank freakin' Welker's voice (though without the flanger/digitisation he sounded like Dr. Claw).
Ravage: Killer design, looks way dangerous, and a bit similar to his steampunk Hearts of Steel design. However, he did this thing while infiltrating the base where he spews up a bunch of what look like iron filings, but are actually nanobots that form into a skeletal, nearly-2d robot. What hit me later was the question of this 2d bot's existance. Was he a drone, controlled by Ravage? Was he a form of Ravage himself? Was he a seperate entity that separates from Ravage like Ravage himself did from Soundwave or Scoponok from Blackout? Once again, Teletraan-1 to the rescue. It seems those were Insecticons that Ravage can launch and cotrol at will, and similar to the one Sam sees later. But none of that was apparent.
Bad Designs that caught my attention:
Alice: okay, I get that she was meant to be a Pretender (though, again, i had to be the know-it-all-jerk and explain it to Craig and Adrian), but jeez louise, if you're meant to be an attractive female, don't pick a body that looks like a former-size-zero-supermodel dunked in pork grease and then expect the audience to go "Phoar, isn't she hot." The only reason she exists is to play out a tired just-caught-with-another-woman cliched storyline to make us think that the Power Couple of Sam & Mikaela would break up. Yawn. Also, am I the only one sick of TV and movies where the following scenario is acted out: the Hero With A Girlfriend (or HWAG) is macked upon by Random Obvious Slut Girl (or ROSG). She'll pin him against the wall, or sit on his lap, or basically physically intimidate him against his will. The HWAG will stammer and squirm, look uncomfortable, and maybe have his eyes dart around looking for a way out for comedic effect. Dude. Strange girl sits on your lap? Shove her. Stand up. Push past her. Drop her like yesterday's newspaper. I mean, this may be me getting amped up about this, but I was near to yelling at the screen. Think I'm overreacting? Picture a guy doing that to a female character. Yeah. It's pretty much an "I like a girl with spirit"-leading-up-to-date-rape situation.
Devastator. Really? That's your pitch? He's essentially an inflated plastic bag with legs, made of metal, and stealing Unicron's main attack, which is to suck everything into his mouth. Yes, you heard it here first, he sucks hard. He sucked an Autobot so hard his face nearly got blown off. I am not making this up. Also, since he's the token fat guy, want to know what challenge he gets? Climbing a pyramid. He even has long hooks and lines to help him climb, but he just keeps sliding down. I began to internally cheer for him. You can do it, biggie! Climb! And then he gets to the top, only to have his head blown off by an unemployed former-government agent-current-deli-worker with a radio-controlled railgun. Let that be a lesson to people who struggle with their weight: never climb anything.
It was WAY WAY too long. Like 45 minutes to an hour too long. The film is 3 hours. This puts it into Anthony Hopkins' Nixon and Lord of the Rings territory. Hey, Michael Bay! I could tell you exactly what to cut. You know when there's the big setup for the battle near the end, and Starscream is attacking, and he send off an EMP which cooks the radios of the troops, and then buggers off? That's where you start, because the next long while is a bunch of military-looking guys sitting in front of computers, barking generic military dialogue led by Glenn Morshower (who I always see as the Ensign from Under Seige that Steven Seagal puts down by saying it's sad that he won't get to see him go through puberty). Then we have planes being redirected, tanks landing, and lots and lots of other unnecessary shots to, I'm assuming, please the military suits who gave Michael Bay a dump truck full of money and wanted their dump-truck's worth. Yawn again. On a side-note, they should ask for some of their money back for this reason. Bay's military don't learn! In the first film, Lennox and his squaddies figured out that conventional weaponry, even tanks, are useless against Transformers larger than a breadbox (the little ones can be whacked with axed, cut with saws, whatever). It took magnesium Sabot rounds burning at 6000 degrees to hurt the smallish Scorponok. So then later in the film, Lennox is able to kill Blackout on his own, using a grenade launcher retrofitted to fire Sabot rounds. In this movie? They're shooting with assault rifles, tanks, and what have you, and, depending on the scene, it's completely useless, or useful. What the?
Anyway, I could talk about the story, such as it was, but this entry is long enough. I gotta wrap it up somewhere. Yeah, it was an okay Transformers movie with some fun action and explosion, but I don't think it's a good movie.
Good designs that caught my attention:
Bad Designs that caught my attention:
Anyway, I could talk about the story, such as it was, but this entry is long enough. I gotta wrap it up somewhere. Yeah, it was an okay Transformers movie with some fun action and explosion, but I don't think it's a good movie.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Blatantly stolen...
...from The Fucking Bluebird of Goddamn Happiness (http://zoethe.livejournal.com/667968.html):
"I admit that I didn't watch this the first time I passed by the link.
But if you are a geek, you totally need to.
EDIT Eep! Spoilery if you still haven't seen the new Star Trek!"
"I admit that I didn't watch this the first time I passed by the link.
But if you are a geek, you totally need to.
EDIT Eep! Spoilery if you still haven't seen the new Star Trek!"
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Jeepers.
What has an afro, a ten-octave vocal range, and is awesome.
Reggie Watts, that's who. We saw this on Good News week, which made me run to the computer and book tickets to see him:
Then I felt glad I had because he did this later:
There's tons more of his stuff on teh YouTubes.
Reggie Watts, that's who. We saw this on Good News week, which made me run to the computer and book tickets to see him:
Then I felt glad I had because he did this later:
There's tons more of his stuff on teh YouTubes.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Winery
So. We've finished our tasting for our Hunter Valley trip. We visited sixteen wineries over four days (technically five days, but the first day we only went to one). We purchased a total of 7 cases of wine (give or take), plus an extra case for Tanja's mother (who gets a mixed dozen of wines from all over the Hunter, tasted by her personal experts, without having to leave her house, the lucky devil). We've dined at some lovely fancy (and also some lovely proletarian) restaurants and cafes. We tasted cheeses for the first time, coming home with some mixed sheep's-, goat's- and cow's-milk cheeses, and a new cheese knife set.
Some observations:
Some observations:
- Many of the fancy restaurants have changed their signs to read “Restaurant and Cafe” in order to not seem too intimidating or expensive.
- Many of the people operating the cellar doors seemed more eager to offer older vintages that weren't on the tasting list if you showed an interest. For example, if they offered a 2008 Semillon and a 2003 Semillon, and you said you preferred the 2003, they would likely pullout a 2001 or 1999 Sem they had under the counter. Tanja and I discussed this and decided it was either A) the financial crisis driving them to push high-end stock, B) that we simply showed taste beyond your average punter and they figured we were in the market for the older, more expensive, higher quality drops, or C) some combination of the two.
- Several of the wineries (specifically Peterson's Champagne House) seem to be geared towards the bus-loads of women on Hen's Night or Bachelorette trips. They have purple couches to sit on, are pushing their sweetest styles, have pre-mixed cocktail mixes or pink plastic martini shakers for sale, and, in one egregious case, sprayed bubbles from the ceiling. Yech.
- There were quite a few younger couples on their own like we were, and tons of Canadians and Americans.
- Lots of high-end cars on the road. At last count, two Ferraris (one vintage, one new), a Maserati, a Ford GT, two Porsches (one Carrera, one SUV), a supercharged and customised Ford F150, and a large number of BMWs and Mercedes (to be expected).
- Leaving your proper camera at home sucks, but frees you up from dragging it around or bothering your partner by making them wait for you to get a picture.
- Apart from the Champagne house, we tasted only one sparkling wine, and bought none. Go figure.
Standout wineries were:
- Keith Tulloch (the only place we bought a full case at)
- Margan
- Pigg's Peake
- Tower Estate
We visited all four of these wineries last trip(a year and a half ago) and bought sparingly. On the flipside, the wineries we bought quite a bit from last time impressed us with only two or three varietals, and sometimes none at all.
So yes! All done with the Hunter for a little while.
Horsing Around
So we thought this trip to the Hunter Valley we would do what every brochure suggests: horseback-riding (far more comfortable than horse-front riding). Tanja had ridden several times before, but my experience was limited. By limited, I might add, I mean that once at the Fredericton Exhibition I was led around in a circle on a pony named Marshmallow. I was 5. So I approached this morning with trepidation.
We, and three other couples (all three women were blonde. Strange) were given our horses and saddled up. Tanja got a grey dapple, and I got a gold/strawberry blonde gelding with, erm, an attitude. Not a bad attitude, per se, but just the sort of manner where he'd decide to stop and then not move. Or slow down and down and down until Tanja's horse behind me was nearly nose-to-tail with mine. Essentially, the horse was trying it on whenever he could, and if he could get away with it? All the better. According to the head rider (who needed to readjust my saddle as my horse had “puffed hisself up when the girth was tightened, then relaxed so youse'll slide around”), this particular horse needed me to keep an eye on him, as he's “cunninger than a shithouse rat, he is”. I dubbed him Smartarse. He did eventually settle down; the head rider gave me a tip to wallop the horse with the reins and “give him a kick in the belly” when he dawdled. After my first tentative attempt, the head rider piped up with “'At's a half-ton 'a horse! You're not gonna hurt 'im! Give 'im a whack!” And I did. And he, contrary to what I thought he would do (buck me over a nearby fence, trample me to death, go to tea), he responded. Go figure.
So Smartarse and I travelled along. Tanja spoke later about how she had to adjust her mind from driving a car to riding on living creature. As I've never driven or rode before, my issue was learning to communicate with Smartarse. Mostly, I spoke to him the way I was speaking to a dog I was trying to cajole. Now, before I come off as the Horse Whisperer, I have no idea if this was having any effect. Essentially, I found horse riding to be similar to sailing or driving a motorboat; you're constantly over-steering and then steering back, always making minor adjustments to keep on a general straight line. How people can do this with just their knees eludes me.
About 45 minutes into the ride, and after Smartarse and negotiated a short trot (we trotted for about 15 seconds, then he stumbled, snorted, slowed down, and returned to a walk, snorting again if I tried to move him faster. Alrighty then) it started to rain. A slight drizzle at first, which didn't bother us. We all had jackets or hoodies on, and the helmets kept off the worst of it. Then it started to pour. And pour. Then the wind picked up. We, and by default, the horses, became quickly drenched from head to toe/hoof. At one point, when the downpour became even heavier, Smartarse turned, against the reins, and put his head towards a nearby fence. I looked up, and without a signal or a sound, all the other horses were pointed the same way, parallel to Smartarse. They had put their, and by default, our, backs to the storm.
While we waited, I had the bright idea to pull up my hood over the helmet. This made sense, bar one fact. A well-woven hood is, in essence, a cup made of fabric. This cup had been hanging down my back during our ride. And it was full. You know the feeling when you're so soaked you can't get any more soaked? Rubbish. There is always more,and colder, soaked to get.
We trekked onwards in the rain, until the head rider called a halt. He said that we were turning back early due to the inclement weather. We had no complaints for the lost 25 minutes or so, as we had all noticed the horses stumbling, snorting, and generally feeling miserable. So back we went.
My one near fall came on the dismount, when a slippery stirrup had me scrambling for a second, but that was the closest I came. Tanja and I hopped into the non-alive vehicle we had brought, drove home with the heater on (the rain had of course, stopped at this point). We arrived back at the cottage, left the doors open to air out the soaked seats, and went inside to a hot bath*. Afterwards, we got dressed in dry clothes and went for lunch about as relaxed as we'd ever been. So good day.
*Said bath was briefly interrupted when we heard the ran start again. Say what you want for gender politics and chivalry in a post-feminist world, it was yours truly who had to throw on a towel, run out into the rain, slam he car doors and run back inside. Sir Walter bloody Raleigh, I am.
We, and three other couples (all three women were blonde. Strange) were given our horses and saddled up. Tanja got a grey dapple, and I got a gold/strawberry blonde gelding with, erm, an attitude. Not a bad attitude, per se, but just the sort of manner where he'd decide to stop and then not move. Or slow down and down and down until Tanja's horse behind me was nearly nose-to-tail with mine. Essentially, the horse was trying it on whenever he could, and if he could get away with it? All the better. According to the head rider (who needed to readjust my saddle as my horse had “puffed hisself up when the girth was tightened, then relaxed so youse'll slide around”), this particular horse needed me to keep an eye on him, as he's “cunninger than a shithouse rat, he is”. I dubbed him Smartarse. He did eventually settle down; the head rider gave me a tip to wallop the horse with the reins and “give him a kick in the belly” when he dawdled. After my first tentative attempt, the head rider piped up with “'At's a half-ton 'a horse! You're not gonna hurt 'im! Give 'im a whack!” And I did. And he, contrary to what I thought he would do (buck me over a nearby fence, trample me to death, go to tea), he responded. Go figure.
So Smartarse and I travelled along. Tanja spoke later about how she had to adjust her mind from driving a car to riding on living creature. As I've never driven or rode before, my issue was learning to communicate with Smartarse. Mostly, I spoke to him the way I was speaking to a dog I was trying to cajole. Now, before I come off as the Horse Whisperer, I have no idea if this was having any effect. Essentially, I found horse riding to be similar to sailing or driving a motorboat; you're constantly over-steering and then steering back, always making minor adjustments to keep on a general straight line. How people can do this with just their knees eludes me.
About 45 minutes into the ride, and after Smartarse and negotiated a short trot (we trotted for about 15 seconds, then he stumbled, snorted, slowed down, and returned to a walk, snorting again if I tried to move him faster. Alrighty then) it started to rain. A slight drizzle at first, which didn't bother us. We all had jackets or hoodies on, and the helmets kept off the worst of it. Then it started to pour. And pour. Then the wind picked up. We, and by default, the horses, became quickly drenched from head to toe/hoof. At one point, when the downpour became even heavier, Smartarse turned, against the reins, and put his head towards a nearby fence. I looked up, and without a signal or a sound, all the other horses were pointed the same way, parallel to Smartarse. They had put their, and by default, our, backs to the storm.
While we waited, I had the bright idea to pull up my hood over the helmet. This made sense, bar one fact. A well-woven hood is, in essence, a cup made of fabric. This cup had been hanging down my back during our ride. And it was full. You know the feeling when you're so soaked you can't get any more soaked? Rubbish. There is always more,and colder, soaked to get.
We trekked onwards in the rain, until the head rider called a halt. He said that we were turning back early due to the inclement weather. We had no complaints for the lost 25 minutes or so, as we had all noticed the horses stumbling, snorting, and generally feeling miserable. So back we went.
My one near fall came on the dismount, when a slippery stirrup had me scrambling for a second, but that was the closest I came. Tanja and I hopped into the non-alive vehicle we had brought, drove home with the heater on (the rain had of course, stopped at this point). We arrived back at the cottage, left the doors open to air out the soaked seats, and went inside to a hot bath*. Afterwards, we got dressed in dry clothes and went for lunch about as relaxed as we'd ever been. So good day.
*Said bath was briefly interrupted when we heard the ran start again. Say what you want for gender politics and chivalry in a post-feminist world, it was yours truly who had to throw on a towel, run out into the rain, slam he car doors and run back inside. Sir Walter bloody Raleigh, I am.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Digest.
I got quite a bit of reading done today.
We headed up to Tanja's folks' place for Mother's Day. Since CityRail bosses seemingly do not have mothers, they scheduled trackwork from Blacktown up to the mountains. I, imagining a long trip, grabbed several digest-sized books from Oni Press that I had purchased in a 50% off sale at Kinokuniya. Later, after gorging myself on steak, cheese, potatoes, bread, crackers, wine, beer, and cake (and then unceremoniously falling asleep in a recliner), I got to read again on the way back. Then, once home, I went back to the sale-pile and read some more. This is what I read:
Hopeless Savage, Vol 2: Ground Zero (By Jen Van Meter & Bryan Lee O'Malley, with 3 other artists helping out)
A really fun and well-written story of a child of two rock stars, her interactions with her family, her friends, the trash newsmedia, and a guy at school. Very sharp and funny (though I was glad the use of made-up slang mostly dropped away after the first few chapters), and using a lot of the teen romance tropes while subverting them at the same time. Like in my other favourite book, Scott Pilgrim, O'Malley's simple art and fantastic facial expressions tell so much with just a few lines. One thing I want to comment on in this book was the strong relationship Zero (the main girl) has with her siblings. It's so nice to see a family of siblings that seemed to genuinely like one another, help one another out, and are supportive. The only disfunctional family relationship is Zero and her mother, and that's treated as an odd occurance. As someone who's read about the Weasleys in the Harry Potter books and the Stantons in the Dark Is Rising Series, I'm wholeheartedly sick of large families that seemingly destroy each other's lives on a day to day basis, only to band together in the end. I don't know, I just don't seem to have patience for that. Fred and George Weasley, for example, drove me mental in the Potter books. But back to Zero's story. Something else interesting is that flashbacks, television and chapter breaks are done by the guest artists, providing a clear shift from the day-to-day lives/art-style. Very cool, and I want the 1st and 3rd volumes now.
Moped Army, vol 1 (By Paul Sizer)
This book makes me a) want to get a moped, and b) make a tshirt/get a patch for my backpack and show Moped Army solidarity. Rich girl forsakes life in upscale super-suburban futuristic city to hang out with the nicest biker gang on the planet. These aren't your Bandidos, though. They're essentially nerds and outsiders of various stripes, a "survivor clique", as coined by one of the characters: punks, hackers, hippies, gearheads, (there's a girl named Chu Toi, pronounced Chew Toy, but she'll freakin' end you if you comment) riding kitbashed mopeds and trying to cobble together a sense of community in a world that's mostly forgotten them. I REALLY liked this. That t-shirt might be in the making soon.They own the skies, but we own the streets!
One Bad Day
Zero character development, flying-by-the-seat-of-your-butt-because-you've-lost-your-pants storyingtelling. It's pretty much a Run-Lola-Run-style action movie in comic book form. Girl sees old acquaintance. Old acquaintance. is hit by car. Girl suddenly being chased. People get hurt. Things get scary. Bad birthday parties are attended. Riveting stuff.
Clockwork Angels: Texas Steampunk Vol. 2
And the big disappointment of the day... I just can't get into manga art. It's the comic-book equivalent of the Wii controller.There are people who adore it and worship it, but if you can't get past the controls, you won't dig the games. I couldn't get past the art style, so found myself unable to pay attention to the story. Everyone looks alike,speech bubble don't point to the right characters, they seem to say things out of the blue and without reason, like an avant-garde French film. And I was really looking forward to this! I love steampunk, and the story that combined mysticism, parlour magic, intrigue and mystery seemed really cool. Too bad I only made it about 15 pages in.
So yeah. Books, huh?
We headed up to Tanja's folks' place for Mother's Day. Since CityRail bosses seemingly do not have mothers, they scheduled trackwork from Blacktown up to the mountains. I, imagining a long trip, grabbed several digest-sized books from Oni Press that I had purchased in a 50% off sale at Kinokuniya. Later, after gorging myself on steak, cheese, potatoes, bread, crackers, wine, beer, and cake (and then unceremoniously falling asleep in a recliner), I got to read again on the way back. Then, once home, I went back to the sale-pile and read some more. This is what I read:
Hopeless Savage, Vol 2: Ground Zero (By Jen Van Meter & Bryan Lee O'Malley, with 3 other artists helping out)
A really fun and well-written story of a child of two rock stars, her interactions with her family, her friends, the trash newsmedia, and a guy at school. Very sharp and funny (though I was glad the use of made-up slang mostly dropped away after the first few chapters), and using a lot of the teen romance tropes while subverting them at the same time. Like in my other favourite book, Scott Pilgrim, O'Malley's simple art and fantastic facial expressions tell so much with just a few lines. One thing I want to comment on in this book was the strong relationship Zero (the main girl) has with her siblings. It's so nice to see a family of siblings that seemed to genuinely like one another, help one another out, and are supportive. The only disfunctional family relationship is Zero and her mother, and that's treated as an odd occurance. As someone who's read about the Weasleys in the Harry Potter books and the Stantons in the Dark Is Rising Series, I'm wholeheartedly sick of large families that seemingly destroy each other's lives on a day to day basis, only to band together in the end. I don't know, I just don't seem to have patience for that. Fred and George Weasley, for example, drove me mental in the Potter books. But back to Zero's story. Something else interesting is that flashbacks, television and chapter breaks are done by the guest artists, providing a clear shift from the day-to-day lives/art-style. Very cool, and I want the 1st and 3rd volumes now.
Moped Army, vol 1 (By Paul Sizer)
This book makes me a) want to get a moped, and b) make a tshirt/get a patch for my backpack and show Moped Army solidarity. Rich girl forsakes life in upscale super-suburban futuristic city to hang out with the nicest biker gang on the planet. These aren't your Bandidos, though. They're essentially nerds and outsiders of various stripes, a "survivor clique", as coined by one of the characters: punks, hackers, hippies, gearheads, (there's a girl named Chu Toi, pronounced Chew Toy, but she'll freakin' end you if you comment) riding kitbashed mopeds and trying to cobble together a sense of community in a world that's mostly forgotten them. I REALLY liked this. That t-shirt might be in the making soon.They own the skies, but we own the streets!
One Bad Day
Zero character development, flying-by-the-seat-of-your-butt-because-you've-lost-your-pants storyingtelling. It's pretty much a Run-Lola-Run-style action movie in comic book form. Girl sees old acquaintance. Old acquaintance. is hit by car. Girl suddenly being chased. People get hurt. Things get scary. Bad birthday parties are attended. Riveting stuff.
Clockwork Angels: Texas Steampunk Vol. 2
And the big disappointment of the day... I just can't get into manga art. It's the comic-book equivalent of the Wii controller.There are people who adore it and worship it, but if you can't get past the controls, you won't dig the games. I couldn't get past the art style, so found myself unable to pay attention to the story. Everyone looks alike,speech bubble don't point to the right characters, they seem to say things out of the blue and without reason, like an avant-garde French film. And I was really looking forward to this! I love steampunk, and the story that combined mysticism, parlour magic, intrigue and mystery seemed really cool. Too bad I only made it about 15 pages in.
So yeah. Books, huh?
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